How to see through the lies in love?
Some scientists have conducted a paradoxical experiment, measuring when people lied most in their lives, and found that when we are in love, we love to lie the most.
But experienced people will surely smile . Love is an illusion created by humans. Without “illusion”, it must not be romantic, but the reason for “illusion” is because of lies.
A couple in the street is like paint, if some lie detector X-rays have passed, you will see that the lie ran through like a spider’s web and wrapped the two together . So, falling in love is a lie.In the battle, you have to pass the lie first.
There are some lies. Don’t expose people who don’t lie, only people who don’t admit they lie.
So it’s not that the lover will lie, but that he doesn’t admit it.
So if you have a clean habit of honesty, and you feel that honesty means never tell a lie, then you can basically withdraw from the rivers of love.
Because in the love world, honesty = sincere lie + practical deception.
If you want to “train” a lover who doesn’t lie, don’t expose Ta!
”Wife, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen .”, “husband, you are the smartest man I have ever encountered .” Cheating like this, everyone knows to enjoy, because of its kindness or loveThe intention is obvious.
But some lies require a little psychological common sense to discern.
Xiao Xuan’s boyfriend works overtime every Friday, which makes her very frustrated.
Because of the great weekend, I always have to spend it by myself.
But by chance, she heard her boyfriend’s colleague say that they do not work overtime every Friday. This information is like a thunderous thunder for Xiao Xuan, “He lied to me, why?
Did he cheat?
Suspicious, she secretly came to her boyfriend’s company on a Friday, waiting at the door to follow him and see who he was going to see.
As a result, her boyfriend didn’t go downstairs. She couldn’t stand it, so she went up to him and found that her boyfriend was playing computer games with her colleagues. It was very suitable that he didn’t see her.Boyfriend loves to this day, often staying together, reducing communication with colleagues circle.
He needs some space for himself, to satisfy the interest in playing games, and to build interpersonal needs.
The company’s colleagues always stay on to play games after finishing working for a week on Friday, but Xiao Xuan has never liked him to play computer games. If he proposes not to accompany her on Friday and play games, she will be crazy.
So he chose to lie.
If you were Xiao Xuan, what would you do?
He rushed directly to his boyfriend and asked, “Are you working overtime?
“; Or call him out and make a loud noise, and then soared:” You can’t stay with me, but you can’t lie to me “line.
But Xiao Xuan did not do so, she quietly left the office and went home by herself.
When her boyfriend called in the evening, she said as softly as before: “Let ‘s discuss something, because some of my girlfriends refused me to be serious, I hope I can get together every week, and we will be ours on Friday.‘自由行动日’吧，反正你也会加班，如果加完班，你也可以和同事们玩一会，吃个饭，聚一聚，你看如何?
“My boyfriend embraced it.
Later, every Friday, her boyfriend called Xiao Xuan and said directly, “I’m playing games with my colleagues. How are you getting together with your sisters?
“Xiao Xuan’s sister gathering has also become a very good interpersonal circle for her.
Her boyfriend no longer needed to lie, because Xiao Xuan discovered his needs and respected his lies, giving him self-esteem and freedom.
Like Xiao Xuan’s boyfriend, many lovers lie not because of sentiment, but because Ta also occasionally needs self-space.
Ta wants to meet his needs, but doesn’t want to cause disputes, which makes him very troublesome, so he panics.
Such a lie is not to hurt others, but to increase some freedom for yourself.
There are also some motivations for lies that hope to reduce the hassle. Some two people are dating and one has arrived. Call and ask the other. Where are you?
Another person was obviously 10 stops behind, but he lied and said that he was 2 stops behind. Some people also lied when some boys chased girls in the early days of dating, some kind of three thousand dollars before their monthly salary.Three thousand after tax . I can say my conditions better without making a big circle, and make the other person fall in love with me; a friend of mine is a female forensic doctor, but when I am in a blind date, I always say that I am an ordinary doctorYes, to avoid the man who is just opposite, he retreats as soon as he hears his career . Some lies are best not to expose it, because such a panic does not mean dishonesty, but rather a desire to be loved, expressing a sincerity-I careHow you feel, I hope I can get closer to you, I do n’t think you are angry, etc. Sometimes you are asking your inner needs-I need some space, I need you to know me better, I need to show my good side more.
It is not clever to see a lover’s lies. Real cleverness is to know how to respect each other’s needs.
When you keep the window paper, but satisfy the mind of Ta, he will naturally open the window to hug you.
There are some lies where you have to spot Zhang Ming’s girlfriend and say to him, “I like you very much, but my mother won’t like you, so let’s not let others know about our together?
He Zizi’s boyfriend who just fell in love said he was divorced, but he refused to show her the divorce certificate, stating: “I lost it when I moved, so find a while .” Lisa’s relationship with her boyfriendAfter three months of traveling together, my boyfriend only opened a room and saw Lisa reluctantly, and said to Lisa, “We only hug, we won’t do anything .” Such a lieBecause of love, we will not see it, but onlookers are clear: you do not see them, and often wait for a sad.
So this requires us to have a bottom line, not to be overthrown by love-all motives for possession, but don’t want to be really responsible, such love lies can’t be endured.
The moment you see through, you’re leaving.
No one can tell you the standard of telling lies. This is completely “experience”. We all have to be interesting. Some lies hide obvious purpose. They are not cute at all. They are a hint,This person is not worthy of love at all, not worth another second.
Cheng Xu’s girlfriend lied to him that the man who often stayed with her was a colleague, but in fact it was her other boyfriend; Wei Ru’s boyfriend lied to her that her relatives were seriously ill and needed money.Once such a lie is discovered, there is nothing to say.
The other party will deceive, that is, purposeful harm, accusing the deceit, but just making yourself more embarrassed.
Still be more interesting, don’t waste time for such a person, lies have shown that the other person does not have you in mind, but only himself.
Accompanying crying: “Why did you lie to me?
“It’s better to leave silently.
But don’t hold on to being cheated to deny yourself or to deny the honesty of most people.
If a lover’s lie makes you unable to believe him anymore, accompanied by anxiety, it is better to leave early.
If Ta ‘s lie has already hinted at his unsteady love, he should leave with interest, do n’t deceive yourself anymore, if the loved one no longer loves to leave, but he may still say “Ta loves me”. This is silly, is n’t it
-The old ticket is no longer able to board Ta’s broken ship, so don’t take the rotten paper and rub it.
A lie to yourself can relieve the sadness of a moment, but it can become a poison of addiction.
Accept the reality and start again. Someone will prove it again. There are still lies in good faith.
Love lies, some for excuses, some for concealment, some for love, some for possession . The motivation is different, which determines whether we open or close our eyes.
90% of sweet words are not true, but you are willing to believe them; some small lies are for the love of you, but they are not deceived by forgiveness; some lies need time to prove its goodwill, and some lies need to be hidden for a lifetime .If we want to be a wise man when we lie, we must carefully examine the motive of those lies, not the lies themselves.
Falling in love is like two people grinding the iron pestle together, pushing trust and responsibility to the past and pulling it back, tossing and persevering, can finally get the “silver needle” of marriage.
For honest cleanliness, sometimes it is the harm to love. You can tolerate a part of lies, don’t expose it, and forgive its selfishness, it is trust.
But for the lies that others are unwilling to take responsibility, we must understand its implication, this is not a fair love, know how to give up in order to obtain responsibility.
You don’t need to make a fuss about lie, or you have to be aware of it. Every lover needs to be a lie before becoming a more determined couple.